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Love Stinks
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Below are the 19 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Tony: The man destined to be alone." journal:
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01:40 pm
[Link] | http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=4741219933576750506
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12:26 pm
[Link] |
So...
Once again updating my live journal for like the first or second time this year. The past few weeks have been up and down. Mostly down. As most people know i am not going into the army anymore. Not a big deal. I quit my job at qdoba's and now I'm an unemployed asshat. I've been fucked over by so many girls in the past month or two it's not funny. Ashley and I broke up probably two monthes ago and now she has pushed herself into my life to fuck my best friend. Guess she figures it'll piss me off. I'm just worried he'll get hurt like the last few times a girl wanted to fuck him.
Now here's a good story. My friend kristov and I meet this girl Amanda...we both like her. So we both go after her and get pissed at each other. The stupid you can have her but i don't mean it banter comes out of both of our lying teeth. But eventually I win after he kicks down my door and starts throwing her shit at me and then later that day fucked her and felt bad cause he realized I liked her much much more then he realized. SO...we start talking cause he told her off blah blah blah. We're cool, we're cuddly, everythings peachy. Then I take her to Joe's crab shack cause she's never had crab before. $50 meal. She loves it blah blah blah. So we go back to her place. Now here's a fun bit to the story. Her roommate is her ex-boyfriends sister who she had broken up with just recently. I ended up sleeping on the floor until about 5am when i got pissed and went in her room and bitched at her for bringing me to her place and making me sleep on the floor.
So few more nights go by i come over blah blah we hang out, i leave come back later to put flowers on her doorstep. (Any girls who read this please distinguish if this is romantic or not cause the last two girls i've done this for stopped calling me shortly after.) Next day get call from her saying she can't hang out today. Then she stops answering her phone for three days. Go to her house. Her roommate says she hasn't seen her. Call and call and call no answer no reply no nothing. Until a week and a half later I call her while I'm on my aunts roof cleaning the gutters out. Joel answers. Joels her ex-boyfriend. Joel's an asshat, a moron, and a closet case. Joel somehow managed to believe that when kris, amber, amanda, and I had a foursome that me and kris were just watching and i was in the closet to feel like a dirty peeping tom. HAHAHA. So he tries to be a dick to me and I just ask him one simple question. How...did...I...taste?
Still haven't talked to her, but i know now that women in general are cheap fucking heartless whores who want nothing more in there lives then dick dick dick dick dick dick DICK. Now maybe there's a few pure ones I could name a few. But then it'd make everyone else feel all left out so yeah...
Current Mood:  nauseated
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07:56 pm
[Link] | So...I'm sitting here bored before work and I decided to update. Here it goes. This week has been pretty good. I got a three day weekend off from Target so I got more sleep then then I did the past two weeks. I started a new job working with some guys I met at coney island doing construction. It pays pretty decent and in cash so I always have money. I went to go see the high school show on saturday. The first show sucked but the second act was awesome. Steph was in it and it was kinda painful to see her. I miss her. Alot. I still love her, but I guess she's happy with her new boyfriend. Atleast someone wins from that situation. That night I talked to her for a long while about things and some stuff she didn't know. Just seeing her lit my life up and I've been in a good mood since. If only things were different. *sigh* Maybe she'll realize that she loved me once and break up with matty-boy. But no one wants that to happen. Her friends hate me, my friends hate her. So I think we're stuck never working. Kinda sad cause she was the first girl i ever dropped all my barriers for. Maybe she'll read this and realize how much I still love her and wanna be with her. Maybe she won't. But then again isn't life a sequence of maybes?
~Tony
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11:10 am
[Link] |
Yup...
As you guys have noticed I only post when I'm pissed off or something substantal happens in my life. Well it's a little of both now. This weekend my life went to shit. I threw a great three day long party. Everyone had a good time. And I made a horrible mistake. I let the alchohol bring out the feelings I thought I got rid of for veronica out of their cage and tried to cheat on steph. Nothing happened, but like they say it's the thought that counts. Veronica told Steph, but I had planned to anyways. Stephanie came over we talked I couldn't look her in the eyes and it's over. I'm honestly demented I swear. I have a fear of commitment but I can't go a second without knowing there's someone there for me to hold. I loved and still love Steph, I guess I just thught I'd miss out on something better if we ended it. I'm not so sure anymore. Sure, I never see her, but it's almost always my fault. I have this huge urge to walk to her house and try to fix things, but I know that I don't deserve her and it wouldn't be the same with her thinking I'll always try to cheat on her. I don't know what to do, I figured this time I could brush it off but it's turning into our last break up. *sigh*
All I can say is I'm sorry.
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05:29 pm
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Ummm...
WHoo! New post! Cause people keep complaining about seeing the same journal everytime they look...you'd think that they just wouldn't look anymore.
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12:51 am
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Play sausage! Who has the longest?
{length:38}-{![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) nightway}-{w23}-{cherita}-{goldy_kin}-{besyonya}-{alexej}-{ivand}-{ta_tochka}-{gosha}-{candelabra}-{nikon_nlg}-{dziro}-{ven_ture}-{xnrrn}-{allegroconmolto}-{soulscode}-{glassapples}-{traveller}-{shaenie}-{nasturtium}-{bunnybaggins}-{juvu}-{blueathena}-{wyldkyss}-{jooolz}-{cybergirl}-{robotgirl} - {crisishour} - {stopitbeautiful} - {khr} - {xfuckjennx} - {iamso1970s} - {rudeboyskank} - {hearyousad} - {nazonatte69} - {pixipowder04} - {dreaminsweet06} - {herdias}
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created by nightway
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12:03 am
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ehn?
So today I worked, got off early to go to D.E.M.F. with pat and andrew. I was supposed to go hang out with this wonderful girl from texas Deanna since my girlfriend can't find time for me since you know Trevor's more important. She's perfect in every way, but she never called back. So now I'm sitting at home alone, horny, and depressed. I haven't had sex in over three weeks and haven't done any sexual activity in that time either. I'm seriously considering just breaking up with Stef only because she wouldn't care if I did. More time for other people. But I love her and can't bring myself to doing it. I just wonder sometimes why we call ourselves a couple.
cou·ple n.
1. Two items of the same kind; a pair.
2. Something that joins or connects two things together; a link.
3. (used with a sing. or pl. verb)
1. Two people united, as by betrothal or marriage.
--- 2. Two people together. ---
Yeah, the last definition...
All mine and her friends keep telling me to dump her and I can't but I can't deal with being with her either. well...if you can call it that. I mean seriously, she's a sophmore I just graduated we're not gonna ever be married so why the torture? Is love worth such a process? To see her once a week for five minutes? I just want her to come over so I can hold her but no, she's at trevor's testing out his spa. whatever...
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07:00 pm
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Valetines...yay?
ok, so I worked this morning. that was easy. burnt myself 4 times but nothing big. then i gave shayna her valentine's day present. don't know why but I did. Was supposed to go out with Marie from warren but she obviously didn't find it important to answer her phone. Pat's fucking his girlfriend, Marc's at work, shayna's with friends and mom's fixing the tub. So here i am, Mr. Lonely. I still don't understand why girls can't be attracted to me. seriously...is it my breath? I'm just really horny i guess and I went crazy yesterday. funny crazy not angry crazy cause pat's jamee kept telling me i had a small penis and it was funny so i went insane. I guess I'm just really tired of settling for the cheap wine when i want the don perion when it comes to women. I don't even think I want a relationship. I just want to fool around with a girl...alot. and then when I'm done I'll bite her ass and go at it again. *sigh* yep...I'm horny.
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01:15 pm
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d00t
So...it's been a month since I've updated. Since then I've gotten a car, had Rachel live at my house and somehow pulled a 88% on my chem final. But most important, I'm in a dilema. I -really- like someone I used to like alot. Don't think I ever stopped. I've always regreted what happened. -Always.- I miss her face, the way she smiles, the smell of her hair and the way she used to look at me. I miss having the feeling that nothing bad could happen to me when I was around her. But I know I stand a snowflakes chance in hades at getting to feel that way again with her. I'm sure you're all reading this and either thinking aww...poor sap. or Tony you're a dumbass. But I don't care cause it's how I feel. *sigh* If only there was someway to redeem myself.
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01:18 am
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A night with the B-man
No! Not batman. Marc, we went and saw timeline then drove around for a bit, then called shayna and ended up at her house. oops, java hutt before that. Fo shizzle. But anyways...after we left shayna's house I called her and Bruce Brakata and Lucy Stranianos talked about how Bruce really like lucy but lucy sorta liked bruce but more as a friend and then Steve Galacowitz came in to mediate cause Bruce wasn't getting anywhere. (marc was at Tony's house) So anyways, I guess Bruce needs to put more Brake in his Brakata. You know, build a normal relationship before having an I like you relationship. At least that's what Steve says and I guess Steve said Lucy agrees. But Bruce has seen that story many a time. You try to be friends and then you say I still like you and they say..."But I don't wanna ruin what we have now" and there ya go...you're still alone. Oh well...Bruce is silly and will try this still cause he -really- likes Lucy. She's pretty, funny, has a gorgeous smile, he loves the way she looks at him, and she just makes his spirits lift when ever she's around. Or atleast that's what I hear from Bruce. But anyways enough about Bruce. I'm lonely. But for once, my loniless isn't despressed loneliness, it's arg why am I not with anyone I like loneliness. But it doesn't really bug me. Well it does, but not as much as usual. ok, wow, mosoltov to me for writing one of my longest journal entries eva! "That is the longest you jackass!" Marc states sarcastically but truthfully. ok, Puits de sommeil mes poupées
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04:17 pm
[Link] | Not much happenin' just working on my stuff. you know.. my "stuff". Haha, now you'll all ponder what my "stuff" is. Hahahahaha
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02:28 pm
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Back
Haven't updated in a while. Alice in wonderland is over, I'm still single, and my grades are shaky. go me. All I want is someone. I'm in a love dot right now. Not a line, not a triangle, not a square or circle. A dot. Just me with nothing to connect to. So please women, come flock. honest...I'm not a bad person.
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12:21 am
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Ok...maybe one person can...
Yep, it's gone. It lasted longer then I figured it would. Shoulda known I wasn't meant for a girl like her. Oh well... we can "still be friends" as she and 98.7% of all girls and america say. Which is cool i guess. Saw matrix 3 tonight...hope the roman catholic church enjoyed the advertisement. I'm in an extremely good mood considering my have a sprained ankle and a sore heart. Later, gonna go clean all night.
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06:46 pm
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Happy.
I'm so Happy. This is awesome. No one could take me off of cloud 9 right now. God, I love feeling like this. *sigh* Did I mention I'm so happy?
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04:32 pm
[Link] | Push me more...do it...I'll just go farther. From a walk to a sprint, becoming more and more what you'll never be. Sprint to lightspeed, moving so fast you'll never know what hit you. Speeding down the path, money, women, success. Soon you'll look like the ant you are. I'll wave bye bye as i laugh and you cry. I'm gone. You're not. Hanging round the high school like they think you're still hot. Travel round the world as you cling to your parents side. Crying at you're knees begging pretty please. Soon I'll buy your soul. I mean that empty hole. Sell you off to nike to work in some tiny little sweat shop that I own.
A poem by Tony Scheer. :)
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01:15 am
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Underworld
ok, so I saw underworld tonight. Wow...great movie. I want to rape Selene..or let her rape me. whichever. One thing that bugged me. Even as an immortal fucking vampire...the black guy still died first. Why?! Why must everyone hate against my peeps. (oh yeah, I'm black now cause I'm 2% black (the skim milk of black people) and cause this 11 year old who is always at my acting class said "Nigga, watch yo mouth" cause I was hitting on nicole. Was quite funny cause I'm white and he's arabic. No nigga's around. Well except sam but he's a gay black actor so that doesn't count. He'll die first anyways.) So yeah, besides the racial discrimination the movie rocked. Yet no one won. gay.
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11:33 pm
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Let's D D Awrhra
So...today I got kicked out of the house. moved back in got chris mad at me for "going aginast our agreement" Selfish prick, and played DDR from 8-11 at major magics.. I'm exhausted. Why am I so lonely? We had read-throughs for alice in wonderland today. The mad hatter and the hare are great. I do ok with humpty dumpty...atleast i can say I have the biggest costume in the cast.. So yeah, life is a mixed box of candies. Never know when the coconut will ruin your day but there's always a chance at that chewy caramel.
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10:54 pm
[Link] | So...I asked a girl out today. I guess she likes me but she thinks my mom hates her. No luck with women I swear.
Current Mood:  lonely
Current Music: Jack's Lament
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08:52 pm
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Welcome to the life of Crap.
So first journal entry. I guess I'll list my crappy week. It's been eventful.
Friday-Went on a date, got home at 6:00am with car. Mom was pissed.
Saturday-Went to festival, all good. Got to go to the cast party cause i was at one time employed there. Made out with a fairy and got in a big fight with Chris...(note to self:never try to cover up kissing a girl covered from neck up in glitter.) Then after we called bigons and got lost in the woods on the way back to car. We got in a car accident. Fun fun, I sprained an ass muscle and a bunch of arm muscles. Stupid kid pulled out from a police turnaround (illegal) and we hit him. He had no liscense. Luckily for me, the car was filled with pop bottles and i didn't break my legs. So we missed Nightmare before Christmas. Bah humbug.
Sunday-Walked around the zoo for 6 hours with my family...that hurt cause of the car accident.
Monday-Had audititions for alice in wonderland. I sucked. then did horrible at my intro to acting class. Marc had to be a bitch and wait til i was trapped in a car to ask if he could fool around with my ex. Guess him, her, chris, jamee, and mike all knew they had been talking for a while. Oh well...as a side note..
I came home and grabbed my boxing gloves and went outside and started punching my oak tree. Then i got pissed off and told god to come down so i could kick his ass and jesus's ass and Gabriel's ass and moses ass...alot of holy peoples asses...It was amusing in a I wanna kill someone kinda way. My neighbor thought I was beating up a black guy.
Tuesday-Had court to lose my liscense. Got the charges lowered and kept my liscense...which I need to find. Been driving without for a few weeks now.
Wednesday-Call backs. Had ten parts she wanted me to try out for. Was at the school til 11:00 filming something for the superintendent. "Answers and Insight with Gary Meyers" Had a $10k camera call on my head...that was fun.
Not much besides that.
Thursday-Bombed a test, got Humpty Dumpty as a part and played with a editing computer for the film studio that costs $50k that we just got as a present.
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